Celebration

A party full of masked faces
made up to look the part
and blend into the crowd,
ideal for thieves. A place to
place a cold knife in deep.
Ears listen for every attack
ready to sound the alarm out
and repeat the hurt in ripples
across the waiting room.
They know how to cut right
through to the beating centre.
Get to the life and soul.

 

This is exactly as it was when I first wrote the poem, and when it was finished I was really happy with it but it has been on a few rounds of submission and now that I look at it a year or so later I think perhaps it is a little too blunt, not quite sophisticated enough. Perhaps I will work on it again some day but I usually find that the poems that come in complete packages often don’t take well to editing and they end up getting messier and messier until they have nothing holding them together anymore.
Anyway it was inspired by the feeling of being in a crowd and not knowing what people really think of you – or of each other.

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3 thoughts on “Celebration

  1. I really like the flow and structure of this, and think that you have captured your objective successfully. I love the phrase ‘ideal for thieves’ in the context of this poem. I tend to agree that you get a feeling when a poem is ‘right’ and in editing this is often lost. Anyway, what do critics and editors know!! I’d happily leave this as it is, Vick.

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